Self-esteem: A Motivation or Sabotage?

Many people are modest about their individual levels of self-respect. There are some who will mask their insecurities with great confidence. Then, there are those who openly profess holding a negatively low opinion about themselves. People’s responses could range from anywhere between gestures of humility to self-aggrandising remarks to even cries of self-pity. It’s a sensitive question altogether. At its core, it is more about fulfilment than it is a matter of self-respect. Surely, with the former comes the latter. The more goals you accomplish, the more you see yourself worthy of respect.

The decision is ultimately one of two; either to strive for ‘more’, or to make peace with what assets one already has at their disposal. People are creatures of purpose. Many of us find our sense of identity in affiliation. Those who wish to venture outside the collective, social norm often resort to honing their skills which they and more often than not, higher ups find agreeable and worthy of recognition.

In our attempts for seeking out opportunities, self-esteem becomes a crucial factor. We wonder to how far an extent our chances are at succeeding. To get the full perspective of building one’s self-esteem, there is a suggest of competition among peers, and even within ourselves. “What makes us stand apart from the crowd?” we second-guess ourselves.

Building our self-esteem

Everyone wants to make themselves look presentable and desirable. Our ideal self would be someone no person, lover, or employer could possibly reject. The extent of how realistic notwithstanding. To look the part, you need to act the part. To do just that, you need to really feel the part.

There is no one way to raising our self-esteem. It works differently for everyone, but some general principles still apply. All in all, we want to improve the aspects of us that we think are in need of change. That is often why many of us get into the hype for keeping up with latest fashion trends, become frequent gym-goers, or reading the kind of books everyone keeps recommending you to pick up.

It is really about conforming to others’ approval. However, the good that comes out of it is that we develop a growing sense of confidence. And with that newfound encouragement, we become a little more daring to begin our attempts at climbing up the social ladder. It is important to seek out validation to a healthy, minimal extent. A big part of it is in simply how comfortable you get with the changes you bring about to yourself. Without risk, there can be no reward.

Lost in overzealousness

Raising our self-esteem should come with increasing responsibility. There is a possible likelihood that we develop an overzealous attitude when facing what we perceive to be a task that offers great reward. This is especially true in cases when said accomplishments are deemed brag-worthy, and when we surround ourselves with individuals we intend to impress.

Believe it or not; perfectionism and occasional bragging are often the traits of people who suffer from low self-esteem. It is important to them that they depend on others’ constant approval, which could loop into a strong inferiority complex.

Sometimes people with low self-esteem spiral with high-functioning depression. They fail to recognise their own competence and self-sufficiency that they are on the persistent lookout for more things they could succeed at. Ultimately, the feeling of satisfaction and contentment are often short-lived. They need to keep progressing. They’ve got their taste of excellence, now they fear to lose the joys and all the perks that came along with it.

This results in a person to showcase too much zeal in their attitudes with others. Such brash and reckless behaviour could work inversely as to what the person initially desired from others, a positive perception of themselves. They may just come off as obnoxious and condescending.

In the long-run

A strong, charismatic and confident individual is a hard offer to turn down. Add those personality traits with evident initiatives that you are more than just what your line of work expects of you, and you are well equipped with the very things that make up an all-rounder.

Plus, it makes you all the more interesting as a person.

Having a high self-esteem is as effective as hope. In fact, you won’t have to look far for it. A person with good self-esteem would have faith in their own capabilities to bring about the desirable outcomes. This may assist a person during their times of hardships and warding off faulty thought processes.

In regards to relationships, you would be more confident in how you express yourself around people. It goes without saying that confidence is to not be confused with haughtiness.

The verdict

So, going back to the question at hand: Is self-esteem a motivation for a person, or is it a sabotage?

Building upon one’s self-esteem is not inherently a bad thing to do. In fact, it is encouraged that we do so. A good self-esteem makes us desirable in our own eyes, as well as in the eyes of others.

Our self-esteem represents a sense of self; something that ensures our uniqueness, separate from everyone else. Without a firm recognition of our own identity, we could easily fall victim to whatever calamity or difficulty that befalls on us.

As with all things, our individual self-esteem is to be handled with responsibly, whereby we should work towards solidifying and building it while also bearing in mind of our limitations.

The bottomline is that our self-esteem should work as a motivational tool to help us achieve grander things in life. In doing so, our self-esteem will continue to grow with our successes.

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